


Sweet Talk

by AKnightOfAGoodKing



Series: Devil May Cry Attends Redgrave Elementary [5]
Category: Devil May Cry
Genre: Affectionate Insults, Arguing, Attempt at Humor, Family, Friendship, Sarcasm, Sweet Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-12-18 17:22:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18254396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AKnightOfAGoodKing/pseuds/AKnightOfAGoodKing
Summary: In which Nero is too genuine to know sarcasm.





	Sweet Talk

**Author's Note:**

> **[DO NOT REPOST/REUSE MY WORK(S) WITHOUT MY ACKNOWLEDGEMENT AND PERMISSION]**
> 
> Nero's cute, and dumb. Because Devil May Cry shares only one (1) braincell.

Nero is frightened, he didn't know that girls can be so terrifying. He doesn't understand why three of them were fighting, he just repeated the same things he'd heard his family say sometimes. 

The boy hides behind his friends, who are watching curiously. 

"Did I say something wrong?" he asks, staying close to them. For some reason, when he's with Nico and Kyrie, the other girls leave him alone, distracted by the newly formed competition between each other. 

"You don't know?" Nico says. "What you said was cute."

"And romantic," Kyrie adds, giggling. "It's like something from one of Credo's movies." 

"Romantic?" Nero repeats, horrified. "But it's just something Dante says to Father sometimes!"

Nico raises an eyebrow. "Give an example of when."

 

_"Dante, learn to clean your messes for once. I am brother, not your maid."_

_"But, Vergil, you have the prettiest eyes, I lose track of time in them."_

_"We have the same eyes, you fool. Now, clean."_

 

"So, he uses it to get out of trouble," Kyrie figures. "That makes a lot more sense now. Wait, what did you do?" 

Nero just shrugs, not answering. 

"Does your uncle say things like that a lot?" Nico asks. 

"I guess?" the boy replies, pouting. "Father says things like that too." 

"Like?" Kyrie asks, urging him on.

 

_"I'm hungry. Order me a pizza."_

_"Stars shine above our heads, yet there is no grander a picture than you, just sitting there."_

_"Shut up, and just order me the damn pizza!"_

 

"I think your daddy's just calling your uncle lazy,” Nico notes. 

Nero's face scrunches up in confusion. "Where do you get that from?" he asks.

"Well, it sounds like your daddy was being sarcastic."

"Sarcastic?" 

Nico and Kyrie share a look. "You don't know what sarcasm is?" the brunette asks carefully. "I thought you knew, everyone in your family is sarcastic."

"Everyone? What do you mean?"

"Give us example of when someone in your family sounded nice, but someone else responds kinda badly," Nico says. "We'll explain it."

"I guess."

 

_"Where's the money you owe me?"_

_"Why, that's nothing compared to the heart of gold that you possess. Why would you need anything else?"_

_"I can't sell it, so I want yours."_

 

"Sounds like Trish didn't have Lady's money," Nico says, thinking about it. 

"Your family talk funny, Nero," Kyrie comments. "Credo never says anything like that to me. But it sounds so pretty." 

"Maybe it's because Nero's family is kinda sophisticated. V always has that book with him, so everyone else must read a lot and steal things from whatever books they're reading. Nero can't read, so that's why he doesn't know or understand."

"Hey, I can read!" Nero protests, crossing his arms. "Who wants to read whatever V reads anyways? Dante doesn't even own books, he only has those magazines." 

"We'll figure this out, tell us more, Nero."

 

_"Every time I see you like this, 'my heart with pleasure fills, and dances with the daffodils'."_

_"Lady, why can't you ever just help me without being mean?"_

 

_"You stink."_

_"It's my manly musk, Trish."_

_"'A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.' You don't, go take a shower. Now."_

 

_"Good morning, Lady. This must be the face that launched a thousand ships. Did you sleep well?"_

_"Vergil, if you speak to me again before I have my coffee, I'll cut off your head."_

 

_"The sun sets in the west, your intelligence shines as bright."_

_"Fuck off!"_

 

"Your family's funny," Kyrie notes with a giggle. "I don't know if they like each other or not." 

Nero shrugs again. "I don't know," he replies. "They just talk a lot, it's annoying."

That's when the other girls came over, still disputing amongst the three of them. "Nero," one of them says with her hands at her waist. "Be my boyfriend."

The boy's eyes widen to ridiculous proportion. "What?" he asks, voice cracking with disbelief. "Boyfriend?  _Me_?"

"No," another argues, "be mine!"

That's when the arguing starts again, the girls pointing and shouting at each other. Nero stares with eyes still wide, looking for a way out of the conversation. 

Nico laughs, patting her friend on the back in comfort, as Kyrie looks sheepish. 

"Pick one!" the three other girls finally shout. 

"Uhm, Nico," Nero spits out, the only way out.

"Huh?" one of the girls says. "It's between the three of us, you're picking outside choices. And didn't you say Ky—"

"We're going to play now!" Nero shouts, knowing he's treading into dangerous territory. He pulls Nico and Kyrie with him. "Okay, bye!"

''Hey, get back here!" 

"Aww, I want to hear the rest of that!" Nico says, grinning like a knowing fool. 

Kyrie shakes her head. "Nero, what did you even say?" she asks, and again, the boy shrugs because she doesn't need to know. 

 

 

 

_"Nero, between the three of us, who's the prettiest girl in the whole class?"_

_"Huh? Why are you asking me?"_

_"Because you're the closest boy."_

_"That's dumb."_

_"Answer the question, stupid."_

_"Ugh, fine. Kyrie."_

_"What?"_

_"Kyrie is the prettiest girl in the whole class. That's the question, isn't it?"_

_"Are you saying that **none of us**  are even close to pretty?"_

_"What? That's not what I said."_

_"You're going to regret that, Nero!"_

_"No, wait, uhm, your hair is really nice, Rapunzel would be jealous! Your eyes are like spring, flowers bloom for you! Uhm, uh, when you talk, your words are like chocolate."_

_"Aw, that's so sweet!"_

_"He's talking about me. Thanks, Nero."_

_"No, **that's** me. Everyone knows I sing the best."_

_"He can't be talking about all of us. Which one is it, Nero?"_

_"Uh, I don't know."_

_"It's me!"_

_"No, me!”_

_"What is happening? Nico, Kyrie, help!"_

**Author's Note:**

> If you like my work(s), please check out [my Twitter](https://twitter.com/kappachyun?s=09).


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